All of us at some
point in time have heard this story or some version of it.
A man once saw another
man lying under a tree and gazing up at the sky. He asked the man “What are you
doing?” The man lying under the tree replied – “Am enjoying looking at the
clouds float by.” The man said “what a waste of time? Why don’t you do
something productive and make some money?” The other asked him “Oh and what
will happen then?” He replied “You will
be rich and famous and can do what you want and be happy” The man under the
tree replied “What do you think am doing now?”
We all want to be
happy don’t we? So what do we do? We go after something that we think will make
us happy.
So we run after,
money, fame, success, praise, etc. What we are doing is to do something that we
think will make us happy when we are done or when we succeed in whatever that
we set out to do. If we succeed we may be happy momentarily, but by then we are
already looking at something else that we think will make us happy and we start
after that. And so on.
Mostly it first starts
from us thinking that we are not happy because we do not have this or that or
someone else has this or that and wanting the same or better. It starts from a
state of unhappiness. Or it starts from us thinking the other is happy because
they have this or that. After all we are social animals and have a mind that is
programmed to think logical. For us everything is with respect to someone else
or something else.
Nothing wrong in
wanting something or wanting to strive for something or being competitive or
aspiring for better. Nothing wrong at all. In fact, the challenge of something
more, something better, something different, is what keeps us alive and
innovative and thinking and leads to change, and evolution and discovery.
The problem is when we
start thinking I will be happy after ‘that” and then after ‘that’ and meanwhile
become more and more unhappy. Being unhappy at times for small periods too is
good as it pushes us and nudges us and makes us try even harder. But over
longer period of times, unhappiness leads to frustration, anger, and all the
related negatives that can also be the beginning of our failure and downfall. It
distances us from people. It spoils our health. It brings in so much negativity
that we start thinking of short cuts and all the wrong ways to make things happen.
It distances us from our true selves.
Aspiring to achieve
something or working towards a goal can be achieved much better if we are happy
to begin with. And here what I am taking of is not happiness that comes from
getting something but happiness that comes from within, happiness that comes
from just living, happiness that comes from the process itself and not just the
goal. Some call it bliss, some meditation but I call it being happy – from the
inside.
Happiness is a state
of mind. It is here and now. It comes from…. Well!!! Just being Happy.
We can all be happy.
Starting Now. Start with a smile. Really ‘Want’ to be happy and lo behold you
can be happy.
When we stop looking
at happiness in other things only do we realize that happiness is within us.
Playing with your cat or dog makes you happy? Going for a run makes you happy?
Playing with your child makes you happy? Being with your lover makes you happy?
Is happiness then, in the dog or cat or road or child or lover? No. Its within
you. And you define what makes you happy. Only you.
Happiness like all
other emotions is just that – an emotion and all your emotions are within you.
When outside stimuli can trigger these emotions why can’t you? But more on that
another day.
Right now just
remember that to be happy all you need is to start now. Start with happiness, then
set goals for achieving something, be it fame, money power or anything else, and
then as you begin, remember to also enjoy the path and the process. Be happy as
you strive and struggle. Enjoy the learning and the pain, enjoy the failures
and the successes, enjoy the company and learning of and from people you come
across the way. Spread your joy and your happiness as you work towards the
goal. When you do get sad or angry or dejected along the way remember that you
are already happy and then you can use that anger or dejection or sadness to
further push towards your goal without dragging yourself down a dark hole.
For the first man in
the story happiness came out of doing something and achieving something where
as for the other it was here and now. But real happiness is in being happy and
going through the journey of life, its ups and downs and its struggles and
laurels, all while being happy. Enjoying every moment as it comes and as it
happens. Be happy in real time. Be Happy Now!
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